Losing Herself
by seashell118
Summary: Charlie watches as Bella slowly starts to turn into a zombie. He can't do much for her, but damn it, he's trying. A short one-shot about the unspoken bond between father and daughter. T for minor language.


**Hello, people! I wasn't really going to post this, but I just wanted to remind you that I am not, in fact, dead.**

**I'm working on the next chapter of Revenge right now, and later I'll update Soldier. If I have time after that, I will update My Brother the Idiot. **

**For now, you can follow me on Twitter, I guess. Link is on my profile page, or you can just search seashell118. Assuming you are interested, which you very well may not be. That is fine.**

**Okay, so I'm rambling. Fanfic commences in five four three two--Stephenie Meyer owns all--one....**

**

* * *

**

_When I came here as a child, he would always remove the bullets as soon as he walked in the door. I guess he considered me old enough now not to shoot myself by accident, and not depressed enough to shoot myself on purpose._

_Twilight, Page 35_

I didn't go to work for a week. I stayed home, doing what I could for my baby girl, which admittedly wasn't much. I gave her water—which she ignored—and ordered pizza—which she refused to eat—but that seemed to be the extent of my paternal abilities. She never needed someone to take care of her before. Now, I was at a loss for what Bella needed.

When Renee flew in from Florida, Bells went into a right state. She threw things and kicked and screamed and generally acted alive for the first time since that son of a bitch left her. I thought things might take a turn for the better then. I was wrong.

Now she was… empty. That was the only way to describe it. Bella was gone, replaced with this empty shell of a girl. Her eyes were blank, her movements were slow. But she urged me to go back to work, and I listened. It's not like I could do much more for her. The least I could do was respect her requests.

And so I went. The cruiser felt unfamiliar to me. It had stuck with me through my darkest times when Renee had left, but this was different. My sorrow was nothing compared to Bella's.

I just couldn't understand it. Her boyfriend leaves her—my hand twitched involuntarily toward the gun on my belt—and she more or less curls up into a ball and lets the world have her.

Not that I was much better when Renee left. I was a mess for months. But that was different. I loved Renee. We were married with a child. What we had was short, but very real.

My shoulders shifted uncomfortably as I maneuvered the cruiser through the familiar rain-soaked highway. Bella had a high school crush. It couldn't possibly be the same.

There wasn't much to do at work. To be honest, there rarely was. Without anything to distract me, I was consumed with thoughts of my daughter. What could I do for her? The answer scared me: nothing. This was something she had to work through on her own.

"Charlie?" The voice cut into my thoughts. I raised my head slowly from my hands. My eyes were bleary. Bella had taken to screaming in her sleep, which constantly kept me up, and so I was so tired I couldn't identify the person in front of me. It could have been my partner, maybe a wanted perp. I couldn't tell.

Whoever it was apologized hastily for bothering me and left in a rush. I must have looked like hell.

When I got home, I wasn't expecting dinner—but that's what I found. Bella was seated at the kitchen table, staring blankly at the wall across the room. There was a dish of lasagna in front of her.

"You didn't have to do that, Bella," I told her as I hung my jacket up. She slowly turned her neck so that her eyes met mine, but the movement seemed to pain her, drain the living energy that she had. She didn't say anything. But the look said it all. I gulped, and she turned back to stare at nothing.

I took one more look at her, so depressed, so helpless, and my heart constricted so fiercely that a jet of ice cold fear jolted through my veins. As I went to hang up my gun belt, I paused.

Then I carefully took out the bullets and shoved them in my pocket.

I couldn't lose my baby girl, not even when she was losing herself.

**Reviews would be absolutely lovely.**

**If you haven't checked out my other fics, feel free to do so. **

**Happy Valentine's day!**


End file.
